


Nail Polish and New Lace

by brumalbreeze



Category: Free!
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-08
Updated: 2014-06-08
Packaged: 2018-02-03 20:04:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,365
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1755863
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brumalbreeze/pseuds/brumalbreeze
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The first time Nagisa remembered his sisters putting nail polish on him, he was three and hated it. Not only did they make him stay absolutely still so that he wouldn’t mess it up, the polish smelled awful to him. It stung his nose and made him feel sick.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Nail Polish and New Lace

**Author's Note:**

> Written as a commission for the prompt of a genderfluid!Nagisa and super-supportive boyfriend!Rei.
> 
> For more information on commissioning me, please see [here](http://brumalbreeze.tumblr.com/commissions)!
> 
> Also on [Tumblr](http://brumalbreeze.tumblr.com/post/88129943312/nail-polish-and-new-lace-rei-nagisa).

The first time Nagisa remembered his sisters putting nail polish on him, he was three and hated it. Not only did they make him stay _absolutely_ still so that he wouldn’t mess it up, the polish smelled awful to him. It stung his nose and made him feel sick.

They didn’t stop though, not even when he cried and tried to run away. They were bigger and faster than him, and there was no way he could escape all six of their hands. Each time they brought out their make-up supplies, Nagisa’s fate was sealed and doomed.

When he got older, he started hating it for another reason.

He learned that _boys_ weren’t supposed to wear nail polish. Only _girls_ did that. And he was a boy, so what was he doing, wearing nail polish and hair clips and dresses? He was supposed to be playing with trains and action figures and airplanes.

But no matter how many times he tried to explain that dressing up wasn’t his idea but his sisters, no one listened to him.

Nagisa hated it. He hated being teased and being called a girl. He hated being called weak.

Until Nagisa finally grew taller than his sisters, around the time he was twelve or thirteen, they continued to torment him by dressing him up and giving him make-overs, and everyone around him continued to tease him. Then he swore that he would stay away from that kind of stuff girly _forever_.

Because _boys_ didn’t do things like that. Only _girls_ did.

And, after all, since he was a boy, he wasn’t supposed to like that kind of thing anyway.

Right?

 

* * *

 

“Nagisa-kun, please at least try to pay attention if you’re going to be coming over to study!”

Rei was exasperatedly trying to motivate his friend with very little success. The only thing Nagisa ended up doing was lift his head just far enough to let it thump back onto the table.

“… Or at least sit up straight?” Rei lowered his standards considerably when it became clear that the shorter boy was not going to be doing anything past that.

“Mmngh. Don’t wanna,” Nagisa grumbled.

Rei sighed and shook his head. After a second, Nagisa reached up to scratch his ear and then let his hand flop onto the table.

“Nagisa-kun!”

At the sound of Rei’s suddenly panicked voice, Nagisa bolted upright.

“What?” he yelled back, equally alarmed.

“Your hand!”

Immediately, he looked at his hand, which looked completely normal.

“What?” he said again, this time more irritated than scared.

“A-Are you hurt? You’re bleeding.” Rei indicated the spot of red that was stuck onto the corner of Nagisa’s finger. “Did you pick at a hangnail again? I told you not to do that.”

Nagisa squinted and then realized what was going on. “Ah, no, I just—I probably got some of the red marker ink on me when I was using one earlier,” he said, pulling his hand off the table. “I’m fine.” He grinned. “And even if I was bleeding, it’s just a little bit of blood. You didn’t have to yell as if my finger had fallen off.”

“Ah, yes, well….” Rei couldn’t think of an excuse, so he just hurriedly fixed his glasses instead.

In his lap, Nagisa discreetly scraped off the stuck-on polish from his nail.

 

* * *

 

 _Snap_.

“Ah!”

“What’s wrong, Gou-san?” Rei called out.

Nagisa poked his head out of the water and looked at Gou, who was wearing a dismayed expression. She held a broken hair-tie in her hands. Her long hair curled around her face and down her back.

“I was just trying to tie my hair up….” She huffed and looked annoyed.

Nagisa pushed himself out of the pool. “One sec!” he said, and then he ran over to his bag. Wet footprints darkened the deck of the pool area. After rummaging around for a second, he came out with two or three decorated hair ties which had penguins and strawberries hanging off them. “You can use these!”

“Oh wow! They’re so adorable, Nagisa-kun!” Gou replied, smiling at the cute decorations. “Thanks. I’ll give them back to you after practice.”

“Nah, it’s okay! I have lots of them at home.”

She tilted her head to one side. “Are you sure?”

He nodded quickly and hopped back into the pool, splashing a close-by Rei with water.

“Nagisa-kun!” the taller boy complained, but he just wiped his face off with a wet hand and frowned.

Suddenly, a thread of mild panic ran through Nagisa’s chest.

“Well, it’s like—my sisters have a lot of those things lying around the house, so I don’t think they’ll miss one or two of them, you know?” he explained to no one in particular.

“That’s an awful lot for you to be carrying around all the time,” Gou commented teasingly while putting up her hair.

“My bangs get in my face too, you know!” Nagisa said, and then he dove underwater in a hurry.

 

* * *

 

“Sorry, I’m late! Did I make you guys wait?”

Nagisa burst onto the rooftop with a plastic bag. His three friends turned to look at him. Haruka shrugged while Makoto reassured him that it was okay, and Rei merely moved over for him to take his usual seat.

“What were you do—Ah.” Rei’s question stopped halfway and, between a big mouthful of his sweet bread and a sip of strawberry milk, Nagisa noticed the taller boy staring at him.

“Mphwart?” he asked through a mouthful of—according to Rei’s facial expressions—gross and disgusting.

His friend waited for him to swallow before going on.

“Your eyes,” Rei said, pointing at his own for emphasis.

He reached up but stopped himself before he smudged the mascara on his lashes.

“Oh yeah, Gou-chan and Chigusa-chan cornered me when I stopped by their classroom earlier.” He sighed heavily and took another bite of his lunch.

The corner of Rei’s mouth quirked up. “It looks good on you. The mascara.”

“Really? It was scary! They used this curler thing that got _really_ close to my eye, and then they put this stuff on it and—”

He didn’t mention to Rei that he had lent the two girls his own mascara instead of letting them use their cheaper brand on his eyes.

 

* * *

 

“Look, Rei-chan! Aren’t these cute?”

Without waiting for his friend, Nagisa dashed into a sock store and went straight toward the display racks of stockings. They were decorated with animal heads on the edges of them, right around the wearer’s thighs. A plethora of designs were available. Cat heads, rabbits, and even penguins.

Nagisa picked up one of the penguin-decorated ones and giggled.

“Would you like a pair?”

“Huh?”

Rei pushed up his glasses. “You seem to like them a lot, and you often wear high socks, so I thought—”

The shorter boy put the box back onto the hook. He laughed. “What are you talking about? Socks and stockings are totally different things! These are definitely for girls anyway, so….” He averted his gaze, then brightened up. “C’mon, Rei-chan! Let’s go to the game center already!”

He was glad that Rei had been wearing long sleeves that day, because he would have felt Nagisa’s sweaty palms on him otherwise.

 

* * *

 

“I like you.”

“… What?”

“That is—I have romantic feelings toward you, a-and was hoping that, perhaps, if you would accept my feelings—and you certainly do not have to if you do not wish it! I… If you would like to… go out with me?”

 _Ah_.

Nagisa didn’t know if he expected this. Maybe he didn’t, because he had always assumed it was one-sided thing. Probably.

It didn’t mean he didn’t sometimes wish it wasn’t though. Between the beginning and end of classes, he would often daydream and wonder if maybe Rei could possibly like him back. Even though he wasn’t as good as swimming as Haruka or Rin, as kind and thoughtful as Makoto, or anywhere near as smart as Rei, he had clung onto the small possibility that the taller boy considered him attractive and likeable.

But he didn’t actually expect this to happen.

“Nagisa-kun?”

But would Rei okay with who he was? Would Rei be okay with—

“Sure,” he blurted out.

That wasn’t what he wanted to say.

Nagisa had wanted more time to think, before Rei got involved in something he didn’t want to be part of. He should explain first, before it was too late for both of them.

“I-I’ll go out with you, Rei-chan.”

But when the taller boy’s face lit up with joy and relief, and he was suddenly embraced strong arms, Nagisa found himself selfishly mute. He had wanted this for a very long time. To be held by Rei like this and call him his boyfriend and maybe even hold hands in public…. Ever since he first saw Rei fly over the high jump bar, he had wanted this.

He reached around and hugged Rei back, breathing in deeply. He was shaking from happiness and nervousness. Nagisa hid his face in Rei’s chest, hoping he wasn’t just dreaming.

 

* * *

 

“Sorry about the mess, Rei-chan! My sisters randomly came into my room last night and—”

Rei’s hand closed over Nagisa’s wrist and stopped him from hiding away a bottle of nail polish, a compact, and a tube of lip gloss that was sitting on his table.

“Nagisa-kun,” Rei called out.

He found himself unable to lift his head and look Rei in the eye.

“Is there something you aren’t telling me?”

Nagisa swallowed hard. “Wh-What do you mean?”

The warmth on his arm went away, and Rei stepped back. The next time he spoke, his voice was small and unsure.

“Are you cheating on me?”

Nagisa’s head snapped up at once.

“What!”

“I-I know that I cornered you when I confessed to you, and maybe you didn’t even want to go out with me but didn’t know how to reject me, but if you don’t want to be with me then—”

“Rei-chan, no, I—” He was about to reach up and grab Rei’s hands, but Nagisa changed his mind at the last minute. He couldn’t bring himself to touch the taller boy, not after he _had_ been keeping a secret from him.

“Then what is it?” Rei asked, his voice growing in volume. His ears and cheeks were burning red with shame. Nagisa hadn’t seen Rei this angry since the night before he went and approached Rin at Samezuka a year ago. “What else could it mean that you always have so many beauty products and things with you? If you don’t have a girlfriend already, then what else should I think it mea—”

Over Rei’s loud voice, Nagisa blurted it out. “I’m genderfluid!”

They both fell silent.

“Okay?” he demanded, his heart pounding hard. “I’m—I’m _not_ cheating on you, and I _don’t_ have another girlfriend, and I’m _not_ a boy, and—” Nagisa’s voice sharpened and splintered as he spat out his words, which broke as tears began to fall from his eyes because, surely, now Rei would be disgusted with him. “I’m just this gross mix of neither here nor there, and I’m _not_ beautiful at all. I’m not beautiful at all, and you must hate me now.”

He lowered his head and stared at the swimming floor while his nose itched and burned. His fists were tight balls against his sides. Nagisa was shaking.

He expected Rei to leave without another word. Just step out of the room, close the door, and pretend he had never confessed, like they had never met.

Nagisa was always afraid this would happen, but he was kidding no one when he agreed to going out with Rei and thought that the taller boy—who was so smart and insightful—would never find out. Rei was oblivious sometimes, but he wasn’t _stupid_.

And now he had ruined everything.

“I’m sorry I never told you. I’m sorry that I lied to you.”

Rei was going to hate him forever.

“I’m sorry….”

He hiccupped and cried, wishing that it wasn’t something as stupid as the fact that he forgot to put his make-up away the night before that had caused all of this. But he didn’t know what else to think. After all, Rei had clearly noticed everything already.

Soft footsteps in the room made Nagisa clench his eyes shut. He didn’t want to watch as Rei walked away.

Suddenly, a very familiar pair of arms wrapped around him and held him close. Nagisa felt as Rei rested his chin on top of his head and nuzzled him.

“Shh,” Rei murmured into his hair. “It’s okay, Nagisa-kun.”

He began to struggle as anger rose to his throat.

“You don’t have to pretend to pity me! If you’re disgusted, then you can just leave!”

But Rei only tightened his hold even more. “Why would you ever say that?”

At Rei’s kind words, Nagisa began crying even harder.

“From the very beginning, the one I liked was you, Nagisa-kun. It doesn’t matter to me whether you’re a boy or a girl or not. I don’t mind at all, because, in the end, you’re still Nagisa-kun to me. And you’ll never be anything else.”

“I was scared—I was scared…!”

Rei smoothed his hand down Nagisa’s back, soothing him quietly.

“Maybe you and everyone else would start hating me because I’m like this! I didn’t want to tell anyone—I didn’t want to lose you guys!” Not after how hard he had tried to catch up with everyone for the past few years. The friendships he had forged were too important to him now.

The taller boy shook his head and squeezed him. “We would never hate you. Did you really think we are as shallow as that? To judge each other on things like this?”

“But sometimes you hear about these stories online and—”

Rei pulled back from their hug and held Nagisa’s face in his hands. “Have more faith in us, Nagisa-kun. Trust us more. We won’t leave you over something like this. We _never_ would. Okay?” His eyes were dark and honest as they looked into Nagisa’s.

He felt his tears wet Rei’s palms.

“Okay?” the taller boy asked again.

Shakily, Nagisa nodded.

“Do you like me?”

While choking back a sob, Nagisa nodded again.

“Good,” Rei said, “then that’s all that matters to me.”

He leaned down and kissed him.

 

* * *

 

“Mmn, I guess it started maybe around last year or so? When I was fourteen?” Nagisa said as he lay on his bed. He had cried a little more after that and gone to wash his face. Rei was crammed next to him with his hands folded over his stomach as they talked.

“I used to really hate it, because, like I said, my sisters would always force me into dresses and stuff, but then… I don’t know. I just sort of came to realize that it didn’t matter. Some days I feel more like a girl and other times more like a boy. And sometimes, it doesn’t matter to me at all.”

He began to gnaw on the corner of his lip.

“It was confusing at first, because I thought I was the only one who felt so weird. Like I didn’t really fit in my own body. But then the next day, it’d be alright. I guess maybe even now, I’m not really sure.”

Rei let the quiet between them sit for a while before replying. “I’m… I’m sorry I wasn’t there to be able to help you.”

He shook his head. “S’not your fault, Rei-chan. I hid it from everyone.”

“And… about earlier. How I accused you of cheating on me. I’m sorry.”

Nagisa said nothing.

“I… I felt really angry at first, because I didn’t know what it all meant. I kept seeing you carrying around hair ties and make-up, and one day, I even saw you with lip gloss smeared on your cheek, even though you only ever used lip balm in front of me. I just thought it meant you had someone else you were seeing, and it hurt me so much.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to accuse you of that….”

Again, the shorter boy shook his head. “No, that was… understandable. I guess anyone would have been suspicious.” Nagisa laughed derisively at himself. “Sorry that, instead of that happening, you ended up with thi—”

Without letting him finish, Rei sat up and pressed his hand over Nagisa’s mouth.

“If you keep saying things like that, Nagisa-kun, I’ll really get angry at you. I already said that it doesn’t matter and that I like you just the way you are, didn’t I?”

Beneath his hand, Nagisa smiled, even though his eyes pricked and hurt again. Rei removed his hand.

“Thanks, Rei-chan.”

Rei leaned down and kissed him.

“By the way,” the taller boy murmured after pulling back, “should I… change the way I call you…?”

Nagisa reached up and ran his fingers through Rei’s hair softly.

“No. I don’t mind. Most of the times, I feel just like me. Hazuki Nagisa.”

Rei smiled. “Okay.”

Their lips came together over and over chastely, until Nagisa giggled and nuzzled his forehead fondly against Rei’s, his heart fluttering and swelling with affection and warmth.

 

* * *

 

“Nagisa-kun, are you alright in there?”

“Yes! I just—ow! Zipper!”

“… Are you _sure_ you’re alright in there?” Rei called out worriedly.

The curtain opened up a little at the top, and Nagisa peeked out.

“Rei-chan, how _scandalous_! Are you trying to come in with me as well?”

Immediately, the taller boy’s face turned a brilliant red. “O-Of course not! What are you…”

But Nagisa had already disappeared again, his giggles spilling out from the dressing room. Rei looked around to make sure that no one had overheard their conversation.

After another half a minute, Nagisa was ready. He pulled aside the curtain halfway and carefully eyed Rei. “Okay,” he said. “I’m ready.”

“As am I then,” Rei replied.

The blond took in a deep breath and pushed the curtain away completely.

He stood in the dressing room with a summery dress on which was beige and decorated with a light flower pattern. The style was casual Lolita, so the bottom of it was filled out with a layer of lace.

Nagisa shifted on his feet nervously. “Well?” he asked.

Rei put a hand to his chin and hummed with a complicated expression on his face. His boyfriend’s gaze was too intense for him, so Nagisa began to smooth out the front of the dress with his hands to pass time.

“Taking into consideration your skin tone and hair color into account, Nagisa-kun, as well as the build of your body,” he said as he walked a short distance away, “might I suggest this light purple, butterfly-print dress instead? I find that it would bring out the color of your eyes and go along with the shade of pale yellow nail polish you had chosen for today’s wear.”

He held up the aforementioned dress by the hanger and pushed up his glasses expertly, looking very proud of himself. Rei had clearly put the dress there in preparation for his long speech.

Nagisa started to laugh. “Rei-chan! You obviously chose that one because it’s your favorite color and animal!”

Rei, who had just finished fixing his glasses, pushed them up again embarrassedly. The shimmery shade of lilac on his nails—carefully applied by Nagisa the night before, after he was done with his own—glittered in the lighting of the store.

“N-Nonsense! If you look at the shape of the waist on this dress, it would _clearly_ accentuate your hips more!”

“Oh, is _that_ where you’re looking at?”

“Nagisa-kun!”

The shorter boy laughed again.

“I’ll try it on,” he said, reaching out with a manicured hand. Then he winked mischievously. “And if it fits, maybe I can wear it for you tonight as well.”

Nagisa watched as Rei turned as red as his glasses and visible short-circuited after hearing his suggestive words. Before he could say anything, the shorter boy slipped back into the changing room and swished the curtain closed with a happy smile.


End file.
